Friday, January 03, 2003

B.C. Pires, writing in the Guardian today, makes ten predictions for 2003, of varying degrees of seriousness (the link is good only until next Friday, because the Guardian still has no permanent online archive). Note particularly nos. 1, 3 & 4, which point directly to what ought to be the great political issue for T&T this year: the future of the UNC. B.C., I'd say you shouldn't write Panday off completely till after the long-overdue local government elections.

• Basdeo Panday will have either health or legal problems that will make the climate in London seem more amenable.

• There will be floods in Central; the PNM will refuse to consider them urgent.

• The UNC will fall apart the moment the old Bas formally leaves it; as a consequence, if he weathers the health/legal problems foreseen above, he won’t retire at all; the moment he slips, Ramesh will slide een.

• Whatever happens, Kamla will never lead the UNC.

• The West Indies will get into the second round of the World Cup in South Africa, beating Sri Lanka on the way; you can determine whether or not we’ll make the finals by checking whether Brian has his costume in Poison. Either way, Brian will announce his retirement from cricket. He will then be picked to play Australia.

• Andre Tanker’s "Rough Jamming" will lick up the place almost as much as "Ben Lion" last Carnival.

• Many more people will be kidnapped which will cause the Minister of National Security to use much more hair gel in his photo-ops.

• George Bush will invade Iraq, causing the deaths of thousands of Arabs. Three American soldiers will be shot by friendly fire. Their story will be told in a 17-part docudrama on ABC. Saddam Hussein will start making videos with Osama Bin Liner.

• You will buy a roti you think is cheap for three dollars and find out you need two 20-oz soft drinks to wash it down.

• The Sopranos will run for another season but Carmel still won’t get to sleep with Furio.

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